#went in on my day off because they were short staffed again yesterday

[autonomousxselves]

//I keep trying to write but I'm going to be busy almost all week with work and family, got scheduled all day July 4th and as proof of yesterday it's not going to be easy working on the interstate during a holiday week so I need to catch up on my sleep more than anything rn. If you're waiting on a reply I'm sorry I will try to get it out this weekend or next week 🙏

[canichangemyblogname]

work rant below the cut:

Apparently, my coworker told my boss that she feels like she’s managing me and my job isn’t getting done. After she informed me of this, I looked at her, “How do you mean?” “You planned the our clothing charity drive some two or so weeks before it started.” 

Okay? It got done.

I called all our community partners who have been drop-off locations every year, asked them if they wanted to partner again, and got an answer from all of them within 26 hrs (all yes). I then told them I’d drop off the donation boxes at a specific date and time. And that was it for logistical planning. After that, I sent the flyer over to our promotional guy and got that and the press release out in time for the event. That press circulated for 6 days at the beginning of the drive and then another 6 before the end.

It takes about two work days to do all of that (most of it is waiting). But I remember her—my coworker—telling me, “The fact that you’re planning this not even a month in advance is stressing me out.” (The drive started on Dec. 9th, I reached out Nov. 18th.) 

Okay??? Because I didn’t do my job to your satisfaction, I’m not doing it at all? Or adequately enough? TF you mean? Because on Nov. 19th, she looked over and asked me, “Hey, have you reached out to the right people to plan our winter clothing drive,” and I responded, “Yeah—I got in touch a yesterday and heard back from all but one as of this morning. Press will be ready for approval end of this week, maybe next week,” she feels like she’s managing me? Was I supposed to announce, “HEY!!! I AM CURRENTLY CALLING ONE OF OUR COMMUNITY PARTNERS RIGHT NOW,” every time I contact someone so she knows I’m doing my job? I already cc her on all relevant correspondence! You’d think the fact that it all got done is evidence that I did my job.

I am staffing EVERY event. I am planning all but TWO events a year. And they all go successfully. The charity drive went well! I came in on MY DAY OFF, NOT her, to collect the donation boxes and start sorting the donation. She has NO idea what I do and when I do it. And then she tells my boss that she feels she’s managing me because she thinks she “reminded” me about the charity drive (she did not).

“But what if one of them said no, then you’d have no time to back-up plan?” First, having a couple work weeks after first response does give one plenty of time to ask another community partner. This event does not require any real logistical planning. Second, our boss has been partnering with the same locations since 2014. If one of them said no, it’s easy to find another. But also— they were not going to say no.

I took care of all the donation boxes. I even took care of regular pick up (she only did pick-up a couple of times, and both times were right after I announced to the office that I was leaving to do pick up, be back in 30 mins). And this is mostly because in the past when she’s done it, it pissed her off. She finds it tedious and a waste of gas (because she drives a gas guzzling truck). But sorry I don’t reach out and plan an event like this three-six months in advance because I don’t have anxiety and regularly catastrophize?

Like??? I literally sent out triple the e-blasts this year than usual because I was planning it. And I was planning it because she didn’t want to. And I didn’t ask her to do her LITERAL job (she’s the outreach and events manager) because she seems constantly pissed off and stressed and very clearly hates her job. And I’m more than willing to provide her the benefit of the doubt because of life circumstances. She *is* stressed! Life *is* hard! She comes into work in tears a lot. She has to go home early because of pain a lot. And that’s okay! But it seems nearly impossible to have a conversation with her anymore. I’ll ask her, “Good morning, how are you” and get silence in response. I ask her about her service dog and how he is (because he brings her lots of joy). “Good.” She’s always short with me, and I’ve been starting to think it’s *because* of me. But I don’t want to think that way; it’s not fair when considering her circumstances. So, I just don’t make requests. Avoids the “I have so much on my plate right now” or short “fine” responses.

And don’t even get me started on the fact that my boss often doesn’t even drop off our donation boxes for the drive often until *after* the drive has started (she keeps them in her storage unit, and I’ve asked her to stop that).

But then my boss is like, “Yeah, I don’t think you’re getting things out on time” because we had to reschedule a public meeting from Jan 13th—and I was not the one who originally picked that date—to today because circumstances changed with the new year and my boss can no longer meet on Monday mornings. That, and because we had the holiday off and I was not able to get the press to circulate quicker than the week of the 6th due to the holiday. So, Mon. 13th was a no-go. The press just wouldn’t have circulated long enough to let people know.

And this is how events go in our office all the time. My boss’ schedule changes last minute and we have to change things around. You plan thing 6 mo in advance and you can guarantee my boss won’t be there because she doesn’t know her schedule 6 mo from now. She wasn’t at several big-big events that required lots of logistics last year (all of which I planned completely) because of this, something she was dissatisfied with.

And also because she’ll tell me she wants an office newsletters to drop—like—the day before she wants it to go out. I am not going to be able to put it together and then leave her time to completely redo it (or rewrite the whole thing using AI) before the end of the work day when she tells me at 11 am-1pm that she wants something to go out at 10 am the next day.

And my boss also told me, “It seems sometimes like there’s a bit of a power struggle between us, and there never should be.” There’s no power struggle, I just fail to see the point of spending hours on something that she eventually redoes with AI. She changes everything last minute. I see no point in planning intricately 3-6 mo ahead. And this was after she told me that I can’t post about things I care about (all very milquetoast vaguely liberal-sounding ideas) anymore on SM associated with my government name because people will complain, I represent her and the office, and she as the owner of the business and me as the manager are held to a higher scrutiny.

And then she had the audacity to tell me that I shouldn’t let my job hold me back from transitioning because “screw what other people think.” Right after telling me that I had to comport myself so as to not piss off randos on the internet because they might invoke her name, business/office, and reputation. Which is it? Become boring (her exact words)? Or “screw what others think” (also her words)? I can’t do both.

Does she think transitioning won’t piss people off? Does she think it isn’t political? Does she think my existence isn’t offensive to most people? Does she think it makes me boring to others?

As long as I work here, I will not have the privacy I need to be happy and comfortable. All I want is privacy, and I can’t get that.

I would also like a coworker who takes initiative to do her job instead of sitting there seemingly to see if I’ll eventually jump in and “do [my] job.” And who does her job without fucking whining about it and talking about how much she hates it.